tales of the hotel st crispian, chapter 134: "a revolution in human understanding"
by horace p sternwall
illustrated by konrad kraus and roy dismas
editorial consultant: Prof. Dan Leo
when sniffy returned from the ladies room to her booth in bob's bowery bar her new poet friend was still there. it looked like he hadn't touched his beer.
"thanks," she told him, as she slid into her seat.
"not a problem," he replied. "i guess the seat must be very important to you, " he added with a straight face.
was that some kind of smart crack? but sniffy just said, "i'm waiting for somebody."
"of course." he stared at her.
"so you're a poet, huh?" she asked him, just to break the silence.
"yes, of sorts."
"aren't all poets of sorts?"
"ha ha. yes, well, i dabble in poetry but it is not my primary avocation."
"no, my primary avocation is science. i am a scientist."
"bully for you."
"yes, i am engaged in a groundbreaking study which i believe will cause a revolution in human understanding in our time."
"double bully for you."
the poet - scientist stared intently at sniffy. "tell me, have you heard of doctor alfred kinsey?"
sniffy stared back. "heard of him? yeah, i've heard of him. and talked to him, too. me and my friend rooster were some of the first people he talked to when he started coming around." she laughed. "so, if you're trying to pass yourself off as kinsey, pal - "
"oh, no no! ha ha, what a thought! no, my name is morgenthaler - percival morgenthaler, and i assure you i am my own man. very much my own man, ha ha!"
"so what's kinsey got to with it?"
"i was just going to say that, like kinsey, i aim to explore a vast area of human experience too long neglected by respectable science. something far, far more fundamental than sex."