chairman - appendix c - charles ashley's proposal

by fred flynn

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my name is charles ashley. my number is 6743-7853-329h. i am a level three technician in in the implementation cohort of the global reorganization project of the empire. i have been assigned to draw up a preliminary proposal to answer a question which was brought up several times at the recent imperial councils. the question being - after the reorganization is complete, what are “the people” ( i e, the 80 billion inhabitants of the planet with no official standing or duties) to do all day? i am grateful to the chairman for allowing me to make this possible humble contribution to the reorganization. instead of one city/building inhabited by all 80 billion persons on earth, i propose that eight cities of 10 billion people be established. the eight cities might be close to each other so that a single energy source can power all of them, but i suggest that they be spaced as far apart as possible around the planet as i think his would increase the spirit of competition which i think it is necessary to foster. all the humans who wish to participate should be offered an endless series of contests and competitions to fill up their days. these contests can be either a) individual. or b) team note: citizens will not be obliged to participate. those who wish to spend their lives quietly in their rooms, eating and sleeping, will be allowed to do so. note: team competitions will not be subject to “tryouts”. all who wish to participate in any competition will be chosen by lottery. in the early stages of the reorganization, due consideration will be given to ensure proportional representation of divergent groups, particularly historically marginalized groups, but as these divergences evolve away into a single “human” type, this will become unnecessary. contests will take place within each city, and the winners or winning teams in each city will then compete against each other to determine final “champions” in each endeavor. the length of time between each “final” can be varied, and staggered to provide a continuous flow of competitions without overloading the attention of the citizens the first contests will be the traditional ones - poetry, football, weightlifting, cake baking, etc - of previous generations, but as the cities are expected to last forever, new contests can be devised as the millenia pass. contests to devise new contests can then be established to replace the worn out ones, and then contests to replace those contests, with some of the older contests recycled judiciously from time to time, creating a new ever-expanding universe of competition. i hope this humble memo makes some small contribution to the discussion. all glory to our immortal chairman/emperor!

the island - 1. the landing

by nick nelson

part 1 of ?

the pilot, an easygoing sort named mike worthington, landed the plane safely on the desert island. some of the passengers were impressed, and grateful. others, not so much, and they angrily demanded to know why it had been necessary to land the plane at all, and insisted that the pilot should have showed some backbone and attempted to make it to san francisco. be that as it may, the plane was down, with all the passengers safe, at least for the time being. outside on the island, all was dark and silent. the two stewardesses, mary harris and betty baker, moved down the aisles, trying to soothe the more agitated passengers. there were twenty-six passengers. the flight had started in hong kong or shanghai with a crew of four - the two stewardesses, the pilot, and an assistant pilot, but the assistant pilot. a surly fellow named dave hunter, was, unknown to the passengers. dead, his lifeless body propped upright in his chair. the twenty-six passengers were: al andrews, an adventurer with a checkered past barton bascomb, a banker cecily chandler, a cocotte daisy dalton, a daredevil - and dynamite eddie edgeworth, an early bird with his eye on the worm frank fairleigh, a fashionable man about town. gary garth, a freelance debt collector herbert hoover, a former president of the united states isaih, a prophet jezebel jones, a lady with a jewel case - and a checkered past kelly kamikaze, a debutante with a fiery temper luke lynch, a lawman and straight shooter miss marcia morris, a harmless looking old lady norris nicholson, a nonentity ollie oliver, “the champ”, a heavyweight boxer pete porterfield, a power broker quentin, a drifter rosalie rogers, a big game hunter loaded for bear sally smith, a school teacher tara tempest, a torch singer uncle bill, a philosopher vinny, an odd jobs man woodrow wilson, a former president of princeton unversity happy, a clown yeti, a captive in the custody of luke lynch zeke, a fiddler and diddler to be continued

chairman - appendix b - eddie 2's quiz

by fred flynn

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1. do you think that any human being should have any more possessions than any other human being? 2. do you think that any living creature should have any more possessions than any other creature? 3. do you think that any human or living creature should have any possessions? 4. do you think all human beings should live in a single city or territory whet their every action and thought can be monitored? 5. do you think all living creatures should live in a single city or territory where their every action and thought can be monitored? 6. do you think that all the resources of the human/living creature community should be directed toward achieving immortality for all humans/living creatures? 7. do you think that the human/living creature community (henceforth referred to as “the city”) should have any laws? 8. would you be willing to be an officer enforcing the laws? 9. do you think the city should have a supreme ruler? 10. how do you think the supreme ruler should be selected? a) by popular vote b) by lottery c) by gladiatorial combat d ) highest score in a test or quiz 11. who or what would administer the vote, lottery, combat, test, or quiz? 12. would you be willing to administer the vote, lottery, combat, test, ror quiz? 13. would you be willing to volunteer to be the supreme ruler? 14. what do you think should be the supreme value of the city? a) freedom b) love c) equality d) fairness 15. should hatred be outlawed in the city? 17. would you volunteer to be a police officer enforcing hate laws? 18. should people accused of hate crimes be given trials or hearings? 19. should people accused of any crimes be given trials or hearings? 20. do you think that people accused of hate crimes can or should be rehabilitated? 21. would you volunteer to be a guard or other staff member at a rehabilitation center for people accused of hate crimes?

chairman - appendix a - eddie's quiz

by fred flynn

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1. do you love the whole human race? 2. do you love all living creatures? 3. would you walk across the street to save the human race from extinction? 4. would you walk across the street to save all living creatures from extinction? 5. if you had a mom, was she a nice person? 6. was your mom the nicest person who ever lived? 6. if you had a dad, was he a nice person? 7. was your first supervisor in day care a nice person? 8. did you enjoy your first day in day care? 9. did you like your fellow creatures in your first day in day care? 10. did they like you? 11. have you ever held a job? 12. did you enjoy your first job? 13. you like your fellow creatures on your first job? 14. did they like you? 15. do you think the human race deserves to last for at least another ten billion years? end of part 1 16. are you a good person or a bad person? 17. what percentage of the human race do you think are good people? 18. what percentage of the human race do you think are bad people? 19. what percentage of the human race do you think just try to get along? 20. do you believe that every human being should be given a guaranteed income? 21. what do you think the guaranteed income should be? a) $1 - $100 annually b) $500,000 annually c) $1,000,000,000 lump sum d) whatever people say they need 22. how do you think this money should be raised? a) print it b) tax rich people who have more than they know what to do with end of part 2 23. do you think it would be a good idea for all human beings to live in a single city and for the rest of the earth to be given back to the earth’s other inhabitants? 24. where would be a good place for the city to be located? a) on the moon b) on mars c) under the ocean d) at the center of the earth 25. how should the city be governed? a). by an emperor elected for life b) by a president elected once a year c) by a president selected by lottery d) it would not need tp be governed at all - every person would just have their own space 26. what will the people in the city do all day? a) watch movies/tv shows b) eat snd sleep c) dream d) wish they lived in a world where they could go to different places 27. if they watched movies, or dreamed. what would the movies or dreams be about? 28. did you find this quiz at all interesting or informative ? next

chairman 22 - through the woods

by fred flynn

part 22 of 22

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the sedan turned off the highway into the woods. there was nothing that could be called a road and it made its way slowly through the trees, having to go around almost every tree one at a time. after they were about a hundred yards in from the highway, agent dworkin touched the control panel and the sedan stopped. are we there? eddie asked. not even close, agent khayyam told him. why not? because we are going to get out and walk. in the woods? these are the woods, aren’t they? i have never walked in the woods before, eddie protested. it will be a learning experience. what about the bugs? there are no bugs in these woods. it has all been taken care of. are you sure? i have never been bitten by a bug. most people in today’s world have not, dworkin said. what if i get tired? eddie asked. will you carry me? if we have to. but we would prefer not to. enough talk, khayyam said. he opened the car door. let’s get moving. * montgomery turned his brain down to lizard level. he began moving slowly through the woods. he was confident he could find his destination just around sunset. the night time was the right time - his time. he had passed this way before. * eddie had fallen asleep. he realized he was being carried on khayyam’s shoulder. they were following dworkin as she carefully parted the low branches on the thickly clustered trees. eddie had a dream in which he remembered first coming to earth… coming to earth with… it was starting to come back to him. suddenly they were in a small clearing. the hut was there, just as it had been twenty thousand years before. there was light showing through the single small window. dworkin pushed open the door of the hut and khayyam followed, depositing eddie, now fully awake, on the floor. eddie got up off the floor and looked around, the old gang from the space ship was all there, seated in a circle in front of the dimly burning fireplace. elvis, bigfoot, gilgamesh, cleopatra, merlin, robin hood, al-hakim, hongwu, genghis khan, shakespeare, babe ruth, and john dillinger. and in the center - donald trump donald trump got up and extended his hand to eddie. it’s been a long time, eddie, he said. welcome home. the end

chairman 21 - the prince

by fred flynn

part 21 of ?

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eddie smith 2 walked slowly up the avenue. it was a nice day. he had enjoyed his downtime with charles ashley and joey but now it was back to serious business he wondered what had happened to eddie smith 1. the poor little guy, he hoped it would turn out all right for him. eddie smith 2 was just an ordinary guy, but he wore many hats and lived a thousand lives. he was the emperor of the universe, also known as the black prince. he was many other things as well, too numerous to mention. now he approached the universal building, also known as the serious business building. eddie smith 3, the security guard on duty at the front door, greeted hin cordially. a nice day, mr prince, eddie smith 3 announced in a booming yet modulated voice. yes it is, eddie smith 2 agreed with a smile. it rained a bit earlier as i recall, but now it is quite pleasant and promises to remain so. eddie smith 2 allowed his brain and essence to be scanned, even though eddie smith 3 knew who he was. as emperor of the universe, eddie believed that strict rules should be followed, by the emperor such as himself, or by humble security guards such as eddie smith 3. the scan being completed, eddie smith 2 the black prince entered the building and took his private elevator up to this office on the 99th floor. the building held 100 floors. he entered his office and prepared to get down to business. before he did, he wondered again what had had transpired with eddie smith 1. and he wondered how the giants were doing in their game with the niners. he had wanted to play quarterback for the niners, but even the black prince could not be everywhere at once. just a couple of quick peeks, he told himself, before i get down to the universe’s business. he switched on to find out. next

chairman 20 - showdown

by fred flynn

part 20 of ?

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the long black limousine rounded the curve of the abandoned highway. the blue sedan was up ahead, just where it should have been. the limo was on manual. montgomery sat in the front seat, operating the vehicle with an old-fashioned steering wheel. montgomery did not believe for one minute that central’s agents in the sedan did not know he was following them, but you had to humor the bow tie people at control. control vs central! for all the marbles! bring it on! communication with control was off - he had been told to turn it on “only in an emergency”. what did that mean? everything was an emergency. life against death, control against central, montgomery against the world. did the people in control think he, montgomery, who had seen and done things too terrible even to have names, could not handle it? the landscape changed. the flat plains on the right gave way to thick woods. now the sedan would turn into a side road. montgomery touched the control panel and the limo speeded up to get closer to the sedan. another curve on the road and the sedan disappeared. was it waiting for him just around the bend? but montgomery was waiting for this just this moment. he pulled over and stopped the limo. he took his old knife, willie, and the new blaster control had given him - which he did not really trust and had not even given a name - out of the front compartment and slipepd both into his belt. he double checked that the limo was not giving off any signals. he got out. he entered the woods. next

chairman 19 - montgomery

by fred flynn

part 19 of ?

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a long black limousine pulled up in front of the flower shop. the limo was overseen by walt montgomery, a big man with a small head. he wore a blue chaufeur’s uniform two sizes too small for him and stared straight ahead with a surly expression.at the rain drops hitting the windshield. beside him sat wally montgomery - no relation - a small young man wearing a sailor suit and languidly licking a chocolate chip ice cream cone. behind them in the rear seat sat wallace montgomery - no relation to walt or wally - a central bureaucrat of savage temper and overweening ambition. walter put his head out the window of the limo. carol the h r person had just turned to al the textile salesman to respond to his suggestion that they enter the flower shop to get in out of the rain. excuse me, walter asked, but would you folks like a lift? this rain is predicted to take quite a violent and unpredictable turn. how can that be predicted if it is unpredictable? carol replied casually. wally laughed so hard he almost dropped his chocolate chip ice cream cone in his lap. even saturnine walt managed a slight smile amounting to little more than a grimace. who the devil are you anyway? al the textile salesman demanded angrily of walt. who am i? i am montgomery. and you, my friend, do not know enough to get in out of the rain. this retort was delivered with such force that no one present exhibited the least urge to either laugh or smile. next

chairman 18 - the looks of this

by fred flynn

part 18 of ?

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after agents dworkin and khayyam left with eddie 1, charles ashley picked his phone up off the table and tapped on it. a picture came up on it of eddie 1 getting into the back seat of the sedan and agent dworkin shutting the rear door of the sedan on him and getting into the front seat herself. the picture closed in on eddie’s head and then on the contents of his brain. charles put the phone back down on the table, with the scan of eddie’s brain running. we will give them thirty minutes. thirty minutes, eddie 2 repeated. where were we? joey asked. charles was telling a story, eddie 2 said. i was? charles asked. what was it about? i can’t remember, eddie 2 admitted. neither can i, joey said. why don’t you start a new one? why don’t you start a new one? charles asked. i told the last one before this. all right, i guess it is my turn, eddie 2 said. go for it, charles told him. eddie 2 took a small deck of playing cards out of his shirt pocket. he quickly shuffled it and put three cards face up on the table. the seven of spades. the three of diamonds. and the six of hearts. i don’t like the looks of this, eddie 2 said. we only have twenty-seven minutes left, charles told him. just do it. all right, here goes. a textile salesman named al, and a corporste h r person named carol , are waiting for a bus outside a flower shop owned by a woman named fatima. it starts to rain. we better get inside, al says to carol. but just then - next