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Tuesday, August 11, 2026

happy song

by horace p sternwall






johnny went down to the station to buy his poor dog a bone
on his way he met hercules, carrying a heavy stone
hercuiles, said johnny, why do you come on so strong
why don’t you put down that rock, and sing a happy song?

hercules responded, in his patented way
why must i listen to this garbage all day?
the world has mistreated me, since the dawn of time
for every nickel you take from me, i want back a dime

john d rockefeller walked the street
and covered miles without missing a beat
he never said hello, or had anything to say
but used his white privilege to make money every day

adolf hitler watched the skies
his hair fell down across his eyes
he had a mustache he could not curl
and destroyed the earth because he could not get a girl

bobo raised rattlesnakes, bozo raised pigs
they drank cheap whiskey and wore blond wigs
they lived in the countryside, far from the crowd
and hated each other but never said so out loud

in a little town on the coast of spain
on the corner of 201st street and main
a banana and an apple sold shares of stock
in a bridge from gibraltar to plymouth rock

the same old story, over again
when women were women, and men were men
adam sold apples, and eve sold trees
and peter pan was left swinging in the breeze

one, two, three, four, five,, six, seven, eight, nine. ten
omar khayyam was the saddest of men
his jug was empty and his poems would not rhyme
he fell in the river and was covered with slime





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