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Thursday, June 22, 2023

in the night, part 1


by nick nelson

part 1 of 2





pete fothergill woke up.

he got up and looked out the window and thought, something terrible is going to happen to me today.

he got dressed and went to work. despite his forebodings, the sun was shining

pete was born in paris pennsylvania in one of the last years of the 20th century.

he had an older brother and a younger sister.

when he was seven years his parents split up and pete and his brother moved with their father to san somewhere in california where his father got a job as a gardener.

pete did not like school.

he went out for the baseball and soccer teams in high school.

he did not make the soccer team. he made the baseball team but did not play much.

his brother jeff made the football team, and jeff relentlessly made fun of pete for playing girly sports.

too bad the school don’t have a softball team for guys. maybe they have one at the y.

jeff loved playing football, but did not much care if the team won or lost, as long as he got some licks in.

pete fell in love with a girl named charlotte zebrinsky. charlotte’s parents had lots of money and she was nicknamed “princess grace” by the other students and did not seem aware in any way of pete’s existence.

jeff and pete drifted apart after they left school.

len, their father, had always had a drinking problem and disappeared.

pete married a girl a few years older than himself named vera lee whom he met online, but they broke up after four months.

pete got a job as a driver for amazon, and then for a small independent delivery service run by a guy named charlie

he liked working for charlie, but would have preferred being a pop star or a pro ballplayer, or winning the lottery.

he bought lottery tickets every week.

end of part 1



Monday, June 19, 2023

two people


by dog e relaford




sam smith was the loneliest man in the world
and hated the whole human race
he wore a red and blue tie and a black mustache
and always had a smile on his face

he married a girl named greta brown
who in people always looked for the best
she always had a smile on her face
and put the world to the test

sam got a job in a building of glass
though his pappy had worked in the mill
his boss always had a smile on her face
as she gave sam roles to fill

the years go by with a smile on their face
looking down on greta and sam
and all the people they pass by
because that is just who they am



Saturday, June 17, 2023

haircut


by bofa xesjum



flora decided to cut kenneth a little slack.

she had become weary of his folderdol.

but decided to give him one more chance.

she set a trap for him outside the old hotel.

larry was watching from the doorway of the abandoned subway station across the street.

it started to rain and larry took the racing form out of his pocket.

suddenly he felt hungry, and decided to go down the street and get himself a burger and fries.

flora was left alone to wait for kenneth.

kenneth, her knight in shining armor from another universe.

until he showed his true colors under cover of darkness

all he had to do was row his little boat through the deluge.

but some people never know when they are well off.

or know what hit them. when it finally does.

a knight has to polish his armor on a regular basis, or it loses its shine.

a curious animal crossed the road.

flora did not see it, but larry would have, except for his sudden craving for the burger.

but hunger is the basic fact of existence, so what are you going to do?

a young man walked up the street toward the old hotel.

his tortoise shell glasses had a strange incandescent shine to them.

the young man walked steadily through the rain, seemingly unaware of it.

some people retain their youthful enthusiasms longer than others.

suddenly flora had a harbinger of foreboding.

two doors down sam the barber was starting to fall asleep waiting for a customer to show up.

sam had had a hard life.

sam was descended from a long line of mighty barbarians.

who had stormed many a castle in the sky in their glory days.

the curious animal wandered down the alley between the hotel and jake’s smoke shop.

a man wearing a brown hat approached the hotel, but he was not kenneth.

nor was he a mighty barbarian.

he walked past sam’s shop, as he was not thinking of getting his hair cut.

the rain stopped.

but started again three hours later.


Tuesday, June 13, 2023

eve


by bofa xesjum




the joke was a victory…

oliver lived in a sewer.

in his previous life he had been an understanding person.

now he decided to hit the road.

it was really funny.

oliver saw evangeline standing on the highway with her thumb out.

as the recreational vehicle approached, oliver made a curious sound.

permit me to introduce myself, oliver addressed evangeline.

you scare me, you slob, evangeline replied.

suddenly a yellow cab appeared in the distance.

oliver and evangeline watched breathlessly as it zoomed toward them.

and then a gorilla appeared in the sky.

does that gorilla belong to you? oliver asked evangeline.

no, but i have worshipped him from afar from the day i was born, evangeline replied.

i guess that is all right then.

but the fun was just beginning.

later, when it was over, evangeline and the gorilla walked down the strangely quiet road,

evangeline had shortened her name to eve.

the gorilla’s name was nelson.

not a creature stirred in the forest on the left side of the road.

at last they came to an abandoned gas station and diner.

we have been here before, said nelson

everybody has been everywhere before, eve replied brusquely.

have it your way.

do you think we could find anything to eat or drink in there?

not likely, and dawn is approaching.

i am going to investigate. you can go on and i will catch you later.

good bye.

the sun came up very quickly.

but a fine mist covered the earth as eve continued on, talking to herself in the way that she had.



Monday, June 12, 2023

gary warner and ted rogers


by nick nelson




gary warner was walking down the street when he was approached by a young woman wielding a red phone.

excuse me, the young woman asked gary, can i ask you a few questions?

maybe.

do you know a man named ted rogers?

that is a pretty common name.

this ted rogers wears a man bun and was on the wilson high basketball team but did not play much and is a big warriors and steph curry fan.

oh yeah, i know that guy.

do you know him well?

he is not my best friend but i know him.

do you mind answering a few questions about him?

if they don’t take too long.

on a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate ted rogers as a person generally, 1 being poor and 10 being excellent?

um - a 4.

how would you rate him as a possible president of the united states?

a 5.

as the leader of a platoon stranded in the jungles of mars?

there aren’t any jungles on mars.

in a jungle on the fourth planet of the andromeda galaxy?

a 3.

how would you rate him as a deadly assassin, assuming he was properly trained?

3.5.

how would you rate ted rogers as a husband and father?

i did not know he was married or had any kids.

he has been married to the same woman for six years and has two kids.

wow, he sounds like a real family man, i will give him a 6 - make it a 7.

how would you rate him on looks?

he was kind of an ugly bastard, i will give him a 2.

how would you rate him on racism, sexism, homophobia and transphobia?

um - i do not know him well enough to say. i do not recall discussing any of those things with him.

thank you vey much, you have been very helpful.

you are welcome.

gary left the young woman entering some notes on her phone, and continued down the street to the parking garage.

suddenly it hit him.

somebody somewhere might be asking questions like that - or even worse - about him, gary warner!

it made him stop and think.

but - what could he do about it?



Friday, June 9, 2023

if


by horace p sternwall



if adam had been a woman
he wouldn’t have been a man
if moses married the pharoah’s daughter
it would have been part of the plan

if eve had been an apple
she would have fallen from the tree
if billy the kid had stayed at home
he would be just like you and me

when columbus discovered america
he put candles on his cake
when daniel boone got lost in the woods
the earth began to shake

cain took a bus to las vegas
because abel was not his brother
if is not one thing, my dear friend
it is because it is another


Thursday, June 1, 2023

people


by walter w johnson iii



people say lots of things
you do not know what they mean
they are possessed by demons
and surrounded by things unseen

people see lots of things
that other people do not
is everything an illusion?
it is just a thought

people are nice
except when they are mean
sometimes the sky is blue
sometimes the grass is green

clouds appear in the sky
and sometimes drift away
other times the rain falls
there is nothing else to say