in the dark

by horace p sternwall illustrated by konrad kraus lift a glass and raise a cheer to the stuffy bankers of yesteryear the snooty dowagers, the butlers stiff the girls named josie, and the guys named cliff the cop on the beat, with his face so red, the bookie with his hat tipped just right on his head the cabbies, the waiters, the hat check girls the saucy debutantes tossing their curls the windbag senator, the girl reporter commissioner johnson and mayor mcwhorter newsboys, shoe shine boys, cracking wise all right - break it up, you guys the playboy spending grandfather's dough chester - you should invest in our show i'll get back to you on that, sweetheart aw come on - all i need is a start abbie the tailor - his cobbler pal moe watch through their windows - the whole city on the go you call that a suit - you call that a hat? i can do you much better than that the sky's the limit - it's looking good if they could see me in the old neighborhood standing on the corner with benny the dip just before he gives me a tip on the fifth horse in the seventh race how did i ever come to this place? trying to get the big story? trying to cover myself with glory? don't send me again to the debutantes dance please, muggsy, won't you give me a chance this story is just about to get hotter and i can blow it right out of the water i know the story is pretty tangled but hey - i got an angle the cops are doing it by the book but i think i see something they overlooked there's never been a story like this before with horror you'll gasp, with laughter you'll roar your mouth will fly open, with delight you will squeal when it all comes together in the last reel