despair

by tom tophead

i woke up this morning with a feeling of despair my head was on the floor and my feet were under the chair rain was beating on the wall and seeping through the window and i wondered with all my heart and soul what had brought me so low i sat up and wondered, where had i been i put my hand in my pockets but of course they had been picked clean outside in the street a truck blew its horn and i wished that i had never been born but i had been born - i surely had so there was no point in getting mad the pertinent question was where was i the rain continued to fall from the sky i sat there wondering why and wherefore when suddenly there was a knock on the door after a last glance around the little room i closed my eyes and awaited my doom later that evening at her majesty’s ball i stood in the corner and read the writing on the wall the rebel armies were advancing from the south the glass fell from my hand and the cigar from my mouth the generals were talking to a maiden fair of whose existence i had not been aware who is that ravishing creature, i asked the black prince but he passed me by, and i have not seen him since the room began spinning, and the walls to shake i wondered how much more i could take perhaps you are asking yourself the same thing but if we wait for a moment the birds will sing who are these wise men invading my dreams do they not realize nothing is what it seems i wrote them a letter a long time ago and for my good intentions have nothing to show

freedom on the corner

by dog e relaford

willie had a boo-boo johnny had a kangaroo they partied hearty with big artie because that is what they were born to do my daddy was a railroad man my mama was a giant squid you can try to hide forever but i know what you did genghis stood on the corner and said to omar khayyam all i wanted was to be free but you do not know who i am all i wanted was to be free and live my life untrammeled won’t you buy this set of dishes made of the finest enamel i wish i had a little dog who came when it was called my uncle joe wore red bow ties and my uncle bob was bald i went downtown to see the show but it was all sold out a band of angels surrounded me and gave a mighty shout now you know how it all started and why i live in a tree the world was there for the taking but you were not nice to me sally had an aardvark who liked sandwiches of cheese one night there was an earthquake and he was gone like a cool breeze

what i have learned from reading a million books in 10,000 lifetimes

by anonymous

there are people - they are probably people, but who knows ? - who rule the world they have ruled it since “the beginning of history” - about 6000 years ago or maybe longer they have complete control over human life, and all life on earth the greatest heroes, the most dedicated revolutionaries, the wisest sages are helpless against them the rulers grind the heroes, the rebels, the sages, into powder and laugh at them every day you and i and the whole human race are their helpless pawns there is an occasional pathetic stab at an uprising but it is quickly shut down they always win there is no light on the horizon and no horizon there is no light at the end of the tunnel and no tunnel and yet - this is the strange part - they, the rulers, are complete idiots who know nothing figures of fun mocked and cursed not only by the wise but by every passing bum or clown or bag lady a newborn child, a cat, a dog, a stone, know more than they why is this? how can this be? do you have any thoughts on this?

jojo

by dog e relaford

jojo went down to the river to buy his poor dog a bone but the river was dry no birds flew in the sky and he was all alone jojo reached into his pocket to find a nickel or a dime but his dog ran away and had nothing to say and jojo was out of time jojo went down to the city to see what was going on in the courthouse and jail there was nothing for sale and he silently watched the dawn jojo went down to the seashore to watch civilization collapse the best and the worst the last and the first are now just splendid chaps

who

by walter w johnson iii

my aunt judy was a nice person but maybe not so nice as we thought my uncle jeffrey made millions selling high end cardboard except that it turned out he really didn’t my sister sally talked until she was eighteen about running away from home but she never even left town and married a guy who worked at the local gas station <> i never did understand what my dad did all day it was easy enough to know what my mom did when i was a child i had a little stuffed bear i never called it a teddy bear my mom used to tell people how much i loved it it was the cutest thing and i was the cutest thing one day we were driving over a bridge on our way to yellowstone national park and i threw the bear out the window into the river below who am i? who is anybody? how are you doing? i have not heard from you in a while

ham and eggs on the corner

by tom tophead

i was standing on the corner waiting for my bulldog to bark when along came my erstwhile acquaintance danny the dinosaur and his longstanding companion sal the shark how are the ham and eggs today, danny asked me pleasantly i had known danny a long time and knew he was always looking for something for free they have been better before, and they also have been worse i replied, giving an opinion easy to reverse we were interrupted by eddie the ectoplasm with his face all in a twist spouting a litany of grievances which we were powerless to resist frank the flounder sauntered by, with his alligator in tow he had had the alligator forever, but it never seemed to grow the alligator’s name was gus, and sometimes he looked sad but all in all, his life was not so bad hoover the mover, the local groover, now entered the scene in his brand spanking new limousine where, i wonder, did the curious expression “brand spanking” originate? perhaps it is futile to speculate jenny the jingler jiggled by, wearing a boot and a shoe and asked if any of us had seen king henry the kangaroo he is hiding in the kitchen with a ham and an egg, miss laura lee opined brightly and do not forget to come to my show, which plays at the palace nightly hiding in the kitchen with a ham and an egg, madam x exclaimed outraged i guess he slipped that one past me, when my attention was otherwise engaged nobody could have guessed what happened next which is the subject of this text out of the swirling depths of space, old man mose appeared he wore the same old stovepipe hat, but seemed to have trimmed his beard peter rabbit, who had the habit, of laughing at all he saw looked around in panic, and said, we had better summon the law i know this poem makes no sense, and apologize in advance i write it under the influence of a demon haunted trance if you see the ham and the egg pass by, tell them i said hello the hand of fate is calling and i really have to go

reptile

by tom tophead

the roaring rotation of the relentless rain penetrates my reptilian brain how many times must i explain that i do not wish to be king again? the corridors of power are filled with dead flowers and the palace stairs are carpeted with despair the spider waits the ambassador of fate i want to go back to my mushroom shack beyond the castle walls where wet leaves fall without a thud in the mud