the great emperor felt the earth trembling under his feet.
he summoned his four wise counselors.
why is the earth trembling under my feet? he asked the counselors.
because a mighty army is approaching from the north, said the first wise counselor.
what should i do? the emperor asked.
raise a mighty army of your own, replied the first counselor.
i already have a mighty army of my own, the emperor said. he turned to the second counselor and asked him -
why is the earth trembling under my feet?
because the great mountain to the west is beginning to crumble, said the second counselor, and when it is gone, floods of barbarians will overwhelm the kingdom.
what should i do? the emperor asked the second wise counselor.
bribe the chiefs of the barbarians with sacks of gold, the counselor replied.
i am already doing that, said the emperor. they are already getting all the gold that all my slaves can mine. he turned to the third wise counselor and asked -
why is the earth trembling under my feet?
because a maiden is approaching from the east, said the third counselor. she is riding a mule, and she is bringing a message that will cause the earth and sky to split apart.
what should i do? asked the emperor. should i have her intercepted, and hanged before she can deliver her message?
the third counselor shook his head. the gods whose message she brings might not like that. perhaps you should wait, and hear the message that she brings, and hope that the earth does not split too close to your feet, and that the sky does not split too close to your head.
you are not very helpful, the emperor told the third counselor. he turned to the fourth wise counselor, and asked him -
why is the earth trembling under my feet?
a master is approaching from the south, said the fourth counselor, bringing a message of his own. he should arrive in three days. perhaps we should wait to hear what he has to say.
that sounds like good advice, said the emperor. we will meet again in three days.
three days later, the emperor was again seated on his throne, with his four wise counselors beside him, and the master who had arrived from the south, a rather ordinary looking individual with a long gray beard, was brought before him.
why is the earth trembling under my feet? the emperor asked the master.
because the earth is under your feet, the master replied.
the emperor was not amused. look here, fellow, he told the master, i have been listening to such so called pearls of wisdom from the likes of you all my weary life. i want something a little more definite.
i think, the first wise counselor interposed, his celestial majesty would appreciate some specific ideas as to how to stop the earth trembling under his feet.
oh, well, in that case replied the master, heed my words -
first - gather all the frogs in the kingdom and have then turned into wolves.
second - gather all the redhaired maidens in the kingdom and have them turned into lions.
third - gather all the cats in the kingdom and have them turned into silver goblets.
fourth - have all the water in all the rivers of the kingdom -
that is quite enough, the second wise counselor interrupted. how do you imagine we are to do all that?
why, said the master, do you not have magicians at your disposal? or at least one master magician?
we thought that you were the master, said the third wise counselor. and that perhaps you could perform some magic?
i am not the master, said the man who had been brought before the emperor and the four counselors. i am not a magician, and i am not even a magician’s apprentice.
who then are you? the fourth wise counselor asked.
i am only a poor peasant, and the master is only my dream.
a dream? the emperor asked.
yes, a dream i had thirty years ago, when i was just a poor goatherd’s assistant. i was caught in a rainstorm with the goatherd’s daughter, and he gave me a tremendous thrashing. when he was done i crawled beneath a pile of hay and began to dream… listen, and you can hear the raindrops falling…
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