station

by horace p sternwall

i was walking down the street with wings on my feet a chap asked me the time i threw him a dime i wanted a nickel, you fool he shouted as we ran back to school where the history teacher, mister fire was discoursing on the roman empire we shook the dust off our shoes and told everybody the news that civilization was dead and we should all have fun instead our pleas fell on deaf ears those were the lean years we felt no elation when, after a long journey, we finally arrived at the railroad station

testament, part 2

by horace p sternwall

part two of two

leonardo da vinci had a master plan he wrote words in the wind and drew pictures in the sand mary magdalen lived in a house she had a dog for a cat and a cat for a mouse nebuchadnezzar kept his fireplace hot he welcomed all wisdom but banished all thought old king cole had a cow and a mule he ate in the stables and slept on a stool pope innocent the second stayed all day in bed with a pipe he never smoked and a book he never read the queen of sheba had mountains of gold but the story of how she spent it will never be told good king richard in the holy land fought king john was a bad man but richard was not sinbad the sailor had a thousand tales to tell he sat in the market with nothing to buy or sell friar tuck and little john sat in the trees and watched the sheriff ride on by with their hands on their knees under the midnight sky all things must pass uncle bud drives his wagon past the rabbit in the grass very soon the vikings will return - a mighty host king arthur and sir galahad will only be ghosts listen to my words and please excuse my rhyme you will never get a nickel only a lousy dime end of part 2

testament, part 1

by horace p sternwall

part one of two

adam had an apple he gave it to eve he told her a story she did not believe blackbeard the pirate was quite a guy he swam in the water and looked at the sky christopher columbus sailed the ocean sea he was a guy just like you and me delilah was a woman with long curly hair she danced in the circus and won prizes at the fair erwin schrodinger had a cat and not a dog he went for a walk and got lost in the fog fatima was a dancer graceful as a fawn she smiled at the sultan and danced until dawn george washington cut down an apple tree consumed with guilt he ran off to sea henry the eighth was fond of steak and kidney pie and drank a river of wine that never ran dry isaac newton let the rain come in he never drank whiskey and he never drank gin prester john was a man of few words he walked in the sand and listened to the birds the king of the world has no home and no throne he rides his mule and throws his dog a bone end of part 1

walter's game

by nick nelson

walter wilson was filled with energy, but it quickly dissipated. he had been born many years ago, as the crow flies. when he was six years old, his contract had been purchased by vince vinson, the richest man in the world. now walter’s contract was up for renewal. walter had hired lillian jones as his agent to negotiate his new contract, but lillian was getting old in her game. naturally, vince vinson did not take any part in these humble negotiations himself. walter was nobody, and lillian was not much more than that. lillian gave walter a date to come to her office to update the information she had, so that she could renegotiate his contract * the date was fourteen days away, but walter only had enough credit for twelve days. what was he to do? he decided to go downtown and hang out on the corner and maybe something would come up. at first, nothing did. walter felt increasingly desperate. he decided to close his eyes and then open them and maybe something would be there. he followed this procedure, counting to ten while he kept his eyes closed. when he opened them again, he was no longer downtown on the corner, but on an ocean liner in the middle of the atlantic ocean. he was leaning on the rail, watching a great white shark frolicking in the wake of the ocean liner. the sun beat down on his head, which was protected by a stiff straw hat. you should throw that hat to the shark, said a melodious voice beside him. but then the sun will beat down on my head, walter replied. those are the chances you have to take, the melodious voice intoned. walter dutifully took the hat off and threw it to the shark. he was accustomed to following orders and had done so all his life.

the proposal, part 3

by nick nelson

part three of three

to read part two, click here

to read part one, click here

johnny turned around. the man in the orange hat was out of sight, with a sigh, johnny began walking back to his abode, where his unfinished proposal waited for him. he was within thirty yards of his destination when a police car pulled up beside him. johnny froze in his tracks. he knew the drill. he waited for the police person or persons to get out of the car, with his hands at his sides like a toy soldier. there were two police persons, a man and a woman. the man wore a purple sash and a black mustache, and with malice his dark eyes flashed. the woman wore blue mascara and a red bandana, and carried herself in a haughty manner. johnny waited for them to speak. after glaring at him for twenty seconds, the man asked - why were you talking to that fellow in the orange hat? johnny tried to remember the details of his encounter with the man in the orange hat. i think he said hello to me first, he finally answered. you think, the male police person sneered menacingly. did you know him? the female police person asked. had you ever seen him before? at first i thought he might be my old friend willie brown, but then i saw that he was not. and then what? the woman asked. i said it might rain. and did it? johnny looked up at the sky. not yet. we are wasting time, the man said menacingly, stroking his black mustache, are you sure you had never seen this fellow before? pretty sure, johnny mumbled apprehensively. let’s find out, the woman said. she took a t-67 out of her pocket and scanned johnny’s brain with it. he never saw him before, she told the man. all right, the man replied grudgingly. and to johnny - didn’t your instructor tell you not to talk to strangers? we have you on file now for a warning, so consider yourself warned. i thought he might be my old friend willie brown. there are two billion willie browns in the universe. most of them can’t be trusted. and with that, the two police officers got back in. their vehicle and drove away, leaving johnny to his thoughts. * with a mere fifteen yards to go to get back home, johnny saw another person coming toward him. what this time. it was a man, neither fat nor thin, with no distinguishing features, wearing a plain gray hat and plain brown shoes. the man came closer. johnny ! willie! oh man, i thought i would never see you again! so, what’s up brother, how are you doing? all right. you live around here? yes, in that building right over there. come on over, i will introduce you to pretty polly. pretty polly? who might she be? she is a great kid, even though she can be kind of a pest sometimes. you will like her. johnny and willie entered the building and took the elevator up to johnny’s room. but polly was not there. johnny never saw her again. and he never finished his proposal. the end

the proposal, part 2

by nick nelson

part two of three

to read part one, click here

johnny decided to walk to the end of the street he was walking on, whatever it was, and if he did not encounter anyone , to turn back. but not, he told himself, necessariiy to work on his proposal. i will close my eyes for ten seconds, he thought, and maybe when i open them i will see wiilie brown or some other friendly human. he closed his eyes. he was not very good at counting to ten without his phone, and gave up at seven. when he opened his eyes, he did indeed see another person heading his way. that worked pretty well, he thought, i should try it more often when i want something to happen. this person had a round head instead of a square one, and wore an orange hat instead of a black one. he was neither fat not thin, and on his face was a foolish grin. he was barefoot. johnny’s heart sank. surely this was not his old friend willie brown. but there was nothing for it but to hope for the best and soldier on, because you never knew. the barefoot man with the orange hat and foolish grin reached johnny. immediately the grin faded and he assumed a rigid posture with his hands at his sides like a royal marine or a swiss guard. johnny had never actually seen a royal marine or a swiss guard and would have been hard pressed to give a detailed description of their respective uniforms. who might you be, out for a walk on this sunny afternoon, the roundheaded man asked johnny, pleasantly enough. i thought it might rain, johnny answered inconsequentially. it might, the man agreed, it always has. suddenly johnny had a frightening thought. maybe this seemingly friendly individual was an establishment spy, walking the streets night and day to draw innocent persons like johnny into compromising conversations. i have to get home before it starts to rain, johnny blurted out. as you please, the orange-hatted barefoot man rejoindered cheerfully, but you are missing out on the chance of a lifetime to engage me in stimulating discourse, as i am - what else? - the last universal genius. some other time, the now properly terrified johnny managed to squeak, and left the man on the sidewalk without looking back. what a narrow escape! he decided to walk another hundred yards before turning back, in order to give the obvious provocateur time to get some distance away. next

the proposal, part 1

by nick nelson

part one of three

johnny white was not making progress on his proposal so he decided to take a break and go for a walk. where are you going? for a walk. i do not think i will be gone long. you do not think you will be gone long? i think you should finish your proposal. i will finish it later. of course you will finish it later. if it is not finished now, it can only be finished later. so why not keep at it? i want to go for a walk. why now, if i may be so bold as to ask? i was thinking about my old friend willie brown, whom i have not seen since he left town. i thought i might run into him if i went for a walk. have you heard that he is back in town? no, but i was thinking about him. why? i just was. i think you should finish your proposal, or at least make some progress on it. i am going for a walk. all right. maybe when you get back you will be more constructively motivated. * the street was deserted, as it usually is in this modern world where nobody has anything to do, anything to say, or anywhere to go. johnny liked it at first. it was a welcome change from his proposal. after a while he saw a figure approaching. was it his old friend willie brown? he realized he did not remember what willie brown looked like, or if he had really existed. the figure came closer. it was a man of indeterminate age, with a square head slightly larger than the average. a black hat sat on the square head. but the shoes on the man’s large feet were a curious shade of purple. hello, johnny addressed the man with the black hat and the purple shoes, are you my old friend willie brown? i most certainly am not. what possessed you to ask such a question? i have forgotten what my old friend willie brown looked like, johnny replied placatingly, and i thought you might be he. i perceive that you use proper grammar, and say might be he, rather than might be him. you must be an educated person, perhaps versed in the classics, eh? i spend a lot of time working on my proposal. that explains it. as well as the fact that you have forgotten what your friend looks like, explains why you thought i might be he. but who are you? that is a rather blunt question. perhaps you are not quite the cultured individual i thought you might be. in which case i bid you good day. johnny, who had thought he might have found a friend, even if was not willie brown, and who had wanted to ask the man with the square head a few questions, was suitably crestfallen at this abrupt dismissal. he considered going back and working on his proposal, but decided to walk on. next