there was a little town on a distant planet.
the inhabitants sort of got along with each other, but they were always arguing.
st agatha, the archangel placed in charge of the little town by the intergalactic empire, thought the inhabitants talked too much, to no purpose.
she decided to have a little fun with them.
the inhabitants were as follows:
jed mason , the mayor
ray cooley, the town drunkard
larry brodie, a juvenile delinquent
bob and wilma cooper, real estate agents
joe marshall, who ran the general store
cathy wilson, a senior systems analyst
debbie darnwell, a junior systems analyst
gloria maxwell, the schoolmarm
harry and sarah brown, who lived on sarah’s pension
annie armstrong, the town tramp
will moke, the sheriff
dave “fatso” jones, the deputy sheriff
max porter and jenny garfield, riffraff
st agatha decided to rewire them all, so that each one had only one word or short phrase that they used to communicate anything and everything.
the words or phrases she assigned were as follows:
jed mason - marsupial
ray cooley - dinner is served
larry brodie - national football league
bob cooper - strawberry shortcake
wilma cooper - down the road
joe marshall - arctic circle
cathy wilson - intense concentration
debbie darnwell - you never know
gloria maxwell - tanganyika
harry brown - holy roman empire
sarah brown - remote mountaintop
annie armstrong - who says?
will moke - prime number
dave “fatso” jones - buffalo chicken wings
max porter - my uncle jonathan
jenny garfield - serenity
as st agatha had suspected, with each townsperson limited in their speech in this manner, life went on pretty much as before.
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