i hid in the bathroom when the dinosaurs landed
and stalin puffed on his pipe
hitler called me a sissy
and bismarck laughed with his dog
the butler ran back to the big house
when the maid forgot the parsley for the vichysoisse
joan of arc laughed when the little dog danced
but joan crawford stared silently at her fingernails
as it turned out
the dinosaurs were not the problem
i sent a telegram to bertrand russell
and was in no mood for subtleties
the pope declined to weigh in
showing a better grasp of diplomacy than history
in my estimation
and also in lenin’s and d’anninzio’s
the lizards in my estimation
were entirely to blame
we may never know the whole story
until balfour writes his memoirs
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