a piece of cake

by bofa xesjum

bob’s favorite food is chocolate cake, and when he eats chocolate cake, especially with vanilla ice cream, he often fantasizes about alice. alice’s favorite color is yellow. alice’s best friend is corinne, who describes herself as a socialist. corinne’s boy friend in high school was dave, who now works as a consultant. dave is now dating elaine, who wants to be a stand up comedian, and also to conquer the world. elaine lives in the apartment below frank, whose most often used expression is “if you say so”. frank has a sister named greta, who has a pet turtle. greta has a secret admirer named hassan, who is filled with rage. every day hassan walks past the door of irene, who is a good person. hassan and irene have a common acquaintance named jack, who thinks of himself as god’s gift to women. karla, who has rebuffed jack in no uncertain terms, is molly’s best friend, and has just broken up with larry, who wants to be the most famous person in the world. larry has noticed maureen, who likes to tell lies about mike, when she walks past the sandwich shop. but maureen has never noticed larry, nor has she ever noticed nick, who does not like yogurt. nick’s mom, oriana, is allergic to cats. oriana’s second husband, pete, does not believe in climate change. pete still thinks fondly of ms quigley, who taught french in high school. pete’s best friend is ralph, a psychopath. ralph is married to susie, whom many people consider charming. susie has a brother named tony, who is quite debonair. tony and susie have an uncle named vince, who is a sports fan. vince places bets with a bookie named walt, who never gets excited about much of anything. it just goes to show you you never know. it is a zero sum game, or the old army game, or all in the game, or whatever.